It’s been two years since that dreaded 2004-2005 Pitt Basketball season has passed. What seemed like a promising basketball season went downhill as the season went. Some thought it was because of focus, some thought it was depth, and some thought it was just a “down year.” Now after two years, one member has finally found closure in this season.
Before Levon Kendall, there was Yuri Demetris. Yuri, a graduate from Shaler, was a fan favorite for most of his stay at Pitt during mop up time at games. He earned time as a starter in the 2004-2005 because of his blue collar steel city work ethic on defense. Pitt got off to a questionable start as they lost games to Bucknell, St, John’s, and Georgetown.
Pitt would then face a close game at Rutgers where Ronald Ramon was having the game of his life. Up 69-66 with seconds to play, Yuri’s world would come crashing down before everyone’s eyes. Ricky Shields got the ball with Yuri guarding him. Ricky faked out Yuri so bad, that Yuri would lose his ankle in the process. To add insult to injury, Shields hit a three to send the game into overtime. The Panthers would eventually win, but Yuri and the Panther team would never be the same. Yuri would never find his ankle and it drove him over the edge.
It was on that night that Yuri would break into his ex-girlfriend’s apartment and go Ike Turner on her. So why did he break into his ex’s apartment? Was he still in love with her? Would he re-enact the final scene in Jerry Mcguire?
“I thought the (expletive) took my (expletive) ankle.” Says Yuri.
Pitt Basketball was the never the same. They got Pittsnogled twice, took an early exit from March Madness, and Chevon Troutman tried to play tight end for the Redskins. As for Yuri, he would be off the team for good after the late night call he made. He would never find his ankle.
That’s until Ricky Shields was cleaning up around his apartment and found a body part in one of his boxes of memorabilia. After some DNA testing, they found out it was an ankle that belonged to Yuri.
“I contacted Coach Dixon about it, and he was excited.” Says Ricky.
After over two years, Yuri would be reunited with his ankle that he lost so long ago.
“I am so happy. I never knew when I would see this day come! I can’t wait to shoot hoops again! Maybe I can now get the NCAA to give me another year of eligibility!” Yuri rejoiced tearfully.
So what did Coach Dixon have to say about this?
“I would love to have Yuri back. He could step in for Levon that he is gone. He would provide good leadership which is what this team needs.” Replied Dixon.
So what’s next for Yuri and his appeal to the NCAA? Stay tuned
Panther Rants is The Onion of Pitt Sports. Formerly a serious recruiting blog written by a serious recruiting writer, the site was taken over by mediocre bloggers that provide satire, sarcasm and anything but serious information. Everything on this site is tongue-in-cheek and is not meant for serious consumption.