Panther Rants is The Onion of Pitt Sports. Formerly a serious recruiting blog written by a serious recruiting writer, the site was taken over by mediocre bloggers that provide satire, sarcasm and anything but serious information. Everything on this site is tongue-in-cheek and is not meant for serious consumption.

Tuesday, July 3, 2007

Wishing you and Yinz a happy 4th

The Staff here at Panther Rants would like to wish everyone who reads our site (all 11 of you) a very happy and healthy Fourth of July. Also, please be safe. If you're gonna' hold an M-80 in your hand and light it, make sure to put the beer down first. And please, if you're going to drink and drive, make sure to use the roads that are usually not congested and, therefore, less likely to have a sobriety checkpoint. Seriously, be safe. We can't afford to lose any loyal readers.

Naturally, it wouldn't be Independence Day at Panther Rants without something Red, Wlat and Blue. So enjoy the enjoy "You're a grand old Wlat," sung to the tune of "You're a Grand Old Flag."

You're a grand old Wlat,
You're a quick kicking Wlat.
And forever our defense did cave.
You're the emblem of
Mediocrity we love.
Where tailbacks ran free and unscathed.
Boosters wives loved you
In their Gold, White and Blue,
At Hi-Tops you'd boast and brag.
Should old Pitt football be forgot,
Place the blame on the grand old Wlat.
You're a grand old Wlat,
You're a gate swinging Wlat
And forever at clipboards you stare.
You were emblem of
The football team we love.
When wins 'gainst legit teams weren't rare.
Our damn face turned blue.
As we screamed shit at you.
As timeouts burned like oily rags.
Should all Big East teams pass up Pitt,
Punch the junk on that nimrod Wlat.


DarkHelmet said...

Did you mean to write "Wlat" or are you lysdexic?

Jimmy John said...