Panther Rants is The Onion of Pitt Sports. Formerly a serious recruiting blog written by a serious recruiting writer, the site was taken over by mediocre bloggers that provide satire, sarcasm and anything but serious information. Everything on this site is tongue-in-cheek and is not meant for serious consumption.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

"I is Antnee....And I is have a website..."

Thank you, Anthony Morelli.

Or should we say Anthony Michael Morelli.

During a week where Pitt actually won and we have very little to bitch and make fun of. During a week where we are gearing up to play a Syracuse team that's so bad that we can barely muster the enthusiasm to make fun of them (but we will anyways). During a week where we expect few people reading our site because Pitt fans rarely bitch on blogs after wins and Syracuse only has 16 fans left, Morelli comes through in the clutch.

Ladies and gentlemen, we present to you, Anthony Morelli

Yes, the former Penn State quarterback done started himself a website. And even though there is a disclaimer saying that the site is not afiliated with Morelli in any way, given some of the entries on the site we can only believe that he's the one performing writing and editing duties. First of all, what "fan" gives enough of a damn to start an Anthony Morelli site? Even he most diehard of Penn State twits wouldn't bother with this. And if they did it wouldn't be for Morelli.

Sccondly, take this gem from his home page:

Anthony Morelli on Penn State's third play from scrimmage in the 2006 season-opener against Akron, Anthony Morelli stepped back for his first pass as the Nittany Lions' starter and threw a picture-perfect 42-yard scoring strike to Deon Butler to begin a successful day and season for the record-breaking quarterback.

Holy jumpin' shitballs. Apparently Anthony Morelli, or whomever is doing the prose for Anthony Morelli, is a big fan of the full name of Anthony Morelli because Anthony Morelli is not once abbreviated to Anthony Morelli's last name anywhere in the paragraph on Anthony Morelli on the home page of Anthony Morelli dawt owrg. We are also told in the "video" section of the site that, "Some of Anthony Morelli Videos might take some time while loading. Please wait for Anthony Morelli videos to load."

Yeah, we'll get right on that.

Still, we have to wonder what the hell the impetus was behind starting this site. Certainly Morelli didn't think there'd be a big market for former Fat 10 Conference slightly above average quarterbacks, did he? There's no, or, or And he might want update the sonofabitch, being that he's not currently on the Arizona Cardinals roster...or any other team's for that matter.

But at least he finally got one thing right: he says that he attended "Penn State University" on his bio. Well, better late than never I guess.

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