A Change Will do you Good

Southside(PR) After a tumultuous start to the season Dave Wannstedt is looking at changes. Undoubtedly, the first thing he would like to do is get rid of the turnovers. "They can expect us to hold onto the football," he said. "That would be the most important thing. We have to protect the ball and not give up any easy scores. As long as we do that, we'll have a chance to beat everybody we play." Other than that key change "The Great Stache" will only make minor tweaks to his pregame routine and to the game itself.

Other changes per Wanny include: A different pregame meal, "I spoke with Foge the other day and we talked a little about the Fish sandwiches." "We'll definitely be eating Buffalo Wings on Saturday. I still don't understand how they come from a Buffalo. I have yet to see wings on them." It's a real head scratcher said Wanndstedt. It sure is Dave! Chase Clowser will get the starting nod at Right tackle, where Joe Thomas struggled mightily. Wannstedt said, Oh I thought Joe did a great job for us last week, but Chase has shown such an affection for devouring Buffalo wings that we just had to put him in the staring lineup against the Bills. Tom Petty, Stevie Nix and Bryan Adams will be blaring from the speakers of Dave's boombox in the locker room. "I am taking my Divo, Journey and Buffalo Springfield cassettes out and giving these new artists a look." You can also expect to see Jonathan Baldwin's, Lucas Nix's and Elijah Field's playing time double. Which means Baldwin will see 4 plays this game as O. Turner drops more passes and you might see Fields and L. Nix get one play each. Other than that, Wanny said no changes will be made to his personal grooming habits, offensive philosophy and play calling and to his thoughts of 4th downs on Buffalo's 35 yard line. "Oh with Bruce Smith out there playing defense you have to play the field position game." Here's hoping that Wannstedt has Sheryl Crow in his cassette collection because more changes can do him good.

Butt Rock Friday - Wannstedt Edition

It's not new news that Wanny loves the 80s. That's all he talks about is the 80's. How good Pitt was in the 80's. How good Miami was with Jimmy in the 80's. How he still prefers his Pontiac Fiero over the leased Cadillac that the university has given him. He can't get enough of them.

Well, here's a video from the 80's; 1986 to be exact. Farm Aid to be even more specific. Tom Petty's, "Even the Losers (get lucky sometime)," which we at Panther Rants believe might be the strategy for the remainder of the season.

Pitt-Buffalo Game Finds a Home!

Our sources have found out that the University of Pittsburgh and the University of Buffalo have come to an agreement with Viacom to have Saturday's game televised. The game will be tied in part with a marathon of the show Night Court on the channel TVLAND. Night Court, a very popular sitcom that aired from 1984 to 1992, is a favorite among viewers.



Steve Pederson, Pitt's AD, released this statement late Wednesday evening:

"As head of the athletic department, it's my goal to ensure that all Pitt fans from around the country are able to watch Pitt Football. We'd like thank Viacom for their assistance on this matter. Night Court was a great comedy show back from the mid-80's to the early 90's which also can be said for our football program in that timespan. TVLAND host a lot of great re-runs from the past. When Pitt fans think of Pitt Football, they think of those times they saw Tony Dorsett run wild or Dan Marino throwing a football. In other words, they reminisce of the past as well. We are hoping this leads to having more games televised on this station in the future."


The head coaches of both programs were also excited on this announcement.

"I'm excited", said Dave Wannstedt, "John Larroquette was very good on that show. Very funny guy. Richard Moll reminds me of Matt C. Every time I told Matt we were punting at Bowling Green's 35 yard line last week, Matt would say 'Ohhh-Kaay'. I plan letting the players watch a bit while I tell them how I was coaching Miami and Dallas with Jimmy Johnson at the the time"

Turner Gill shared the same sentiments.....

"We used to watch this show when I played in the CFL. It wasn't on when I was in college. Roz was one of my favorite characters. She had that Soul-Glo hairstyle. Guys used to always give me a hard time for liking Roz so much."

Pitt will host Buffalo at Heinz Field at 6pm. The Night Court marathon will be shown on the JumboTron before and after the game.

Pitt Looks to the Past for Buffalo Game

OAKLAND (PR) – After a near upset of MAC juggernaut Bowling Green, the Pitt Panthers embark on a crucial week of preparation for Saturday’s home contest with Buffalo. Knowing that they’ll likely face Marv Levy’s vaunted no-huddle offense and the likes of Bruce Smith and Darryl Talley on defense, Dave Wannstedt is consulting the NFL Films archives for this week’s game plan.

“We know what they’ll do on offense in the no-huddle spread with their pro bowl talent, but since I’ve been coaching defense for years that’s the least of our worries,” Wannstedt said from his IROC Camaro in Blawnox. “It’s our offense that has to get going, their defense has great players who make great plays at great speeds.” The coaching staff believes the answer could be in the Super Bowl XXV game film, which saw Buffalo lose the first of four Super Bowls to the New York Giants.

“We talked to Steve Sabol down at NFL Films, and we got a copy of that film to look at for this week,” said Wannstedt. “The Giants used the same game plan as we had last week: by trying to run the ball every chance they got with some short 5-yard pass routes on 3rd and 10’s. We’re confident that if the Giants can beat the Bills with 20 points and a good kicker like Matt Bahr, we can do the same and that’s where we’re at.”

Offensive Coordinator Matt Cavanaugh is equally excited by his offense’s potential. “Seeing Otis Anderson bust through the Buffalo defense and watching Jeff Hostetler engineer 15-play drives that end in field goals gives us a lot of confidence,” Cavanaugh said from his bungalow in Oakland. “We played for field position and for 3 points against Bowling Green and we all saw how well that went, so we’re confident that this time we can win one that no one expects us to,” Cavanaugh remarked. “Besides, you know Scott Norwood is gonna choke when it gets down to it, so why worry?”

Pitt receiver Oderick Turner is especially ecstatic about Saturday’s matchup as his father, Odessa, was a receiver on that Super Bowl-winning Giants team. “Dad always told me stories growing up about that game, so I’m pumped to be playing that same Buffalo team,” Turner said. “When he heard that we were using that game film to study Buffalo this week, he assured me that Coaches Wannstedt and Cavanaugh were geniuses.” Odessa also had some more fatherly advice for his son. “Pops told me that he didn’t even see the field in Super Bowl XXV, let alone catch a ball, so I shouldn’t be worried if they don’t throw to me at all.”

Weekly update with Foge!

Pittsburgh, PA (PR) After a dismal performance against the MAC powerhouse Bowling Green Falcons, we caught up with our old friend, Foge.

PR: How do you feel your performance was in the booth for the first time?

FF: Much better than the coaching staff’s (performance) was on the sideline. In the booth, everything went pretty smooth. The drinks never stopped being served and thank goodness, because I needed it to watch that nonsense! Bill and Bill were very cordial. I just had to keep nudging Fralic to keep him awake. Why are there so many Mckillop’s and Nix’s? It so hard to keep up with Chris and Scott and Nate and Lucas, who coincidentally, didn’t get into the game but I’ll get to that later.

PR: What were your overall thoughts about the game?

FF: Well, quite honestly it sucked. How do you want me to break it down?

PR: OK, lets break down certain aspects of the team and grade them.

PR: Coaching?

FF: F; and that’s being generous. No substitutions for Decicco, Joe Thomas, O. Turner or McCoy.

Offensive play calling was brutal. The game plan, if you can call it that, was ultra conservative. No play-action passes, No Greg Cross, No imagination, NO STUGOTS!

Defensive play calling; almost as bad. Not enough blitzing until very late. Conversely, BG coaches adjusted and blitzed almost every play.

PR: Special Teams?

FF: D; It could’ve been worse but the kickoff coverage team did well. That Dave Brutus kid (Brytus) must have received an injury from a submission hold in mixed martial arts matches or taken too many shots to the head. Any he’s terrible.

Connor Lee was not much better.

PR: Offensive line?

FF: D -; Joe Thomas wouldn’t even make the two deep for BG. Nuff said he stinks. The others were not much better. No fumbled snaps though so that was nice.

PR: Receivers?

FF: D; O Turner must have the same pictures of Wanny in an awkward situation that Cavanaugh has of him. How many more big drops can this practice hero have?

PR: Running backs?

FF: C+ Stephens-Howling look good. The Heisman candidate was auditioning for Dancing with the Stars. First, you have good college career, then an NFL hall of fame career, then you do Dancing With the Stars. Collins, nice blocking especially the time where he let Stull get killed.

PR: Quarterback?

FF: D+ Not bad, but with Cavy as your OC, you could be Dan Marino and in this offense appear to be coked up, ahh never mind. With that being said I know Dan Marino and Bill Stull, you are no Dan Marino.

PR: Overall Defense?

FF: C+; but I was calling plays in the booth but nobody would listen. My system would have shut them out.

DL; B+ actually did a decent job going against a plethora of passes.

Linebackers: C+ But Bennett took an All-American linebacker and made him play CB. Should have only had Chris, er Bill or Whatever the hell Mckillop’s first name is in there. Fields and Buddy Jackson should have been playing slot receivers. Force them to run.

Secondary: F Deccico, a fellow paison must have had too much vino the night before. That always hurt my teams in the 80’s. Wide-eyed Thatcher, closed his eyes and dropped a sure int. Bennett should have had is DBs playing tight coverage.

PR: How does Pitt fix the problem?

FF: Wow! I am not really sure. I do know that Wanny has to have more testicular fortitude and let his kids play to win. You know my old buddy Herm said “YOU PLAY TO WIN THE GAMES” Cavy should be sent south to work at a roadside stand in South Carolina selling boiled peanuts. Terrible, just terrible.

If not, blow it all up. An uh ummm, I’m available.

PR: Is there anything else that maybe making this team tired and uninterested?

FF: Again, have you seen the game planning? C’mon, that speaks for itself. Hold on I’ve got it! It’s the pre-game meal. Every time that they have the Fish sandwiches from the Castle Shannon Fire Department they get shigellosis. That, along with the Iron City, creates a volatile situation. I’ve got to go save Pitt football and tell them to stop serving this. That’s it! That should work. SeeYa!

PR: Bye Foge, we’ll see you next week.

Dining With Dave

BALDWIN (PR) - We stopped by the local Volunteer Fired Department today for a fish-fry and a conversation with Coach Wannstedt. On the menu: your choice of baked potato or fries, slaw or potato salad, and fish sandwich (cod or catfish). Coach explained the situation. "Right here, you got a great guy making the potatoes. He's a good man, from right around the corner. He's been fighting fires for 30 years. Some say he isn't the best but he's been doing it a long time and that counts for something with me. And his sour cream and chives are right on target." Coach continued, "and over here you have the fish sandwich guy. His name is Larry and we go way back to the 60's, playing together and eating fried fish. Today I'm going with the catfish." We asked coach if he felt the qualities of a bottom-dwelling creature that feeds off the remnants of those above him and really can never rise above his lowly state was somehow symbolic. "You got that right! The catfish is just misunderstood - he does all the right things, works hard, puts in his time, hangs out with the right crowd. Some people expect him to do things that he wasn't coache...I mean, things that aren't in his DNA. He'll never dine on the good stuff and he's ok with that. He's what Pittsburgh is all about; and he's what I'm all about."

We then asked the Stache about slaw versus potato salad. "I tell ya one thing, going with the potato salad is the smart play. You should never take any chances in life; play it close, go the route that is guaranteed, don't shoot too high. See, the slaw is sometimes great and sometimes Ned over there, he's the youngest son of ol' Charlie, well, he just doesn't have experience. And yeah, he's a trained chef at that fancy school dahntahn, and maybe it's good. But Willy, he's been making the potato salad for a long time. LONG time. And he's from around the block here. So you can't go against that, no matter what else is out there. I'll take Willy's potato salad any day. And I'll punch someone in the mouth if they want to tell me different."

Dave Wannstedt Press Conference

Pitt Coach Dave Wannstedt held his weekly press conference Tuesday at a fish fry down at the local Fire Hall 976. Dave talked about the Bowling Green game and about the upcoming game against Buffalo. Ice cold IC Light was served and you had a choice between coleslaw and fries. Pierogies were an option as well.

On the Bowling Green:

"It was a great effort by the staff and the players on Saturday. We almost pulled off an impossible upset over Bowling Green. They are a very solid program in the MAC. We fought hard, but we came up short in the end. We had some costly turnovers, some missed opportunities, and a missed field goal. We had it going when we were up 14-0. Once Bowling Green came back, we knew it was going to be a battle the rest of the way. We played hard, but we just fell short. That's all there is to it. "

On the game plan:

"We wanted to keep the game plan simple. We didn't want to force anything or be too daring because who knows how the game would have really went. We figured if we kept what we did on offense simple and let the defense dictate the game, then everything would have worked out. We had a new quarterback leading the offense since Matt graduated. Tony Dorsett is now in the pros collecting a paycheck. When you lose those two coming off a national championship from two seasons ago, it can be a challenge to bounce back. We decided five to ten yard passes would be the key, and we would take our chances on whether Oderick Turner could catch a football.

We also had some 4th down situations at around the 35 yard line and we could have went for it. That's not always the best option. We wanted to make this game interesting so we just decided to punt instead."

On making adjustments:

"Adjustments? What are those? We don't know what those are. You guys are thinking way to ahead to the future. We had a good game plan, but we just didn't execute. We turned the ball over way too many times and we didn't block well. Joe Thomas is still doing his Michael Jackson moonwalk impersonation and he's gotten pretty good at it. We did decide to blitz. Blitzing is a new thing for us and figured we'd try it. It did work, but that's not how to coach football."


On the Buffalo game:

"This one should be a big test for us. Buffalo runs a no-huddle offense and they have a good coach in Marv Levy. Jim Kelly is one hell of a quarterback, they have a speedy back in Thurman Thomas, and Andre Reed is a big play receiver. Their defense worries you as well. Bruce Smith and Shane Conlan will be players we'll have to watch out for. I figure we'll keep the game plan simple again and just move the ball one yard at a time. I don't want to overwhelm the players too much. Well that's it for now. I will see everyone at the game on Saturday. Right now, I need a cold Ahrn City.