tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61263282812965633792024-03-21T00:45:40.221-04:00Panther RantsWhere we long for the days of mediocrityDouble-wide Headbandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16639828882107776400noreply@blogger.comBlogger504125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-40338587503743228832018-09-30T13:28:00.000-04:002018-09-30T13:28:09.572-04:00Pitt Announces Replacement for Sweet CarolinePittsburgh -<br />
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The University of Pittsburgh announced some changes for home football games. In a controversial move, the beloved tradition of fans singing "Sweet Caroline," will be replaced with Sarah McLachlan's, "I Will Remember You." Additionally, while the song is playing, the sad tortured animal videos commercial that the song is often associated with will be displayed on the Heinz Field video screen. A member of Pitt's media department, Joyce McDougal, was asked about the change. "Well, we wanted a song that was more representative of the mood of the fans in the stadium. We know they're miserable so we wanted music that would match that emotion."<br />
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McDougal continued, "We're also doing away with some of the other 'hype' songs that have been played at the venue. No more 'Crazy Train' and all of that nonsense. You'll hear A LOT of Tori Amos and, 'Stan' by Eminem. Further, during big 3rd downs for the defense, we'll be playing Johnny Cash's version of 'Hurt.'"<br />
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<br />Wlat 3:16http://www.blogger.com/profile/12628862261761216257noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-34018424652879884672018-09-22T18:01:00.001-04:002018-09-22T18:01:43.127-04:00<h2 align="center">
<u>Watson Lashes Out at Reporter After Loss to UNC</u></h2>
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Chapel Hill (PR) - University of Pittsburgh Offensive Coordinator Shawn Watson got into a heated argument with a reporter and had to be restrained after the Panthers loss to North Carolina Saturday afternoon. </div>
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Watson, who is in his second year with Pitt, became openly hostile when a reporter from the West Chester Morning Wood asked his team's passing game. </div>
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"Look, I don't control what the rules are. Would I like forward passes to be legal, sure. But it is what it is," Watson said in a post game news conference. </div>
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When he was told that, not only are forward passes legal, but they have been for nearly 125 years, Watson yelled, "fake news" and lunged at the reporter. Watson was quickly restrained and removed from the room before he could answer whether or not he knew that it was legal to make halftime adjustments. </div>
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Paul Rhoads' Pogo Ballhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09518115137577464632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-89409125298323879192018-09-14T11:23:00.002-04:002018-09-14T13:18:48.224-04:00<br />
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<u>Five Things We’d Like To See Saturday</u></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">The editorial team at Panther Rants considered compiling a
list of 10 things we’d like to see tomorrow afternoon in Pitt’s noon tilt with
Georgia Tech, but given the complete ineptitude that was on display against Penn
State last week, we felt that may be too aggressive. Truthfully, even a top
three may be asking too much. Regardless, here at the five things we’d like to
see tomorrow against the Yellow Jackets. </span></div>
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<span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "calibri";">1.</span><span style="font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font: 7pt "Times New Roman"; margin: 0px;">
</span></span></span><span style="font-family: "calibri";"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Pat
Narduzzi Not Get Flagged For Acting a Fool. </b>We get it: he’s fiery. He’s
passionate. He’s intense. He’s…the Naaaaard Dog!!!! He’s also an ass who gave
Penn State great field position by not being able to keep his emotions in
check. In comes Georgia Tech and Paul Johnson, a coach who, in addition to
having a face that looks like a butt, has traded barbs and insults with
Narduzzi in the past. Can we please please please avoid a game misconduct
penalty this week?</span></div>
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<span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "calibri";">2.</span><span style="font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font: 7pt "Times New Roman"; margin: 0px;">
</span></span></span><span style="font-family: "calibri";"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Shawn
Watson. </b>In typical Pitt fan fashion, this guy had one big win (the upset of
Miami on Black Friday) and suddenly all prior sins were forgotten. Bottom line
is this offense isn’t just unproductive, it’s boring. Couple that with Watson’s
bizarre and downright idiotic play calling in the first half against the
Nittany Lions and these next six weeks are fish or cut bait time. We don’t
expect him to be Mike Leach or Norm Chow, because Lord knows he’s never shown
even a glimpse of that. At this point, our only hope is for Watson to simply
script the game right. Run when common sense says to run and vice versa with
the pass. And, if for some reason you find yourself at the opposition’s
four-yard-line on fourth down, come up with something better than that 1963
Woody Hayes piece of trash you threw at us last week.<span style="margin: 0px;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "calibri";">3.</span><span style="font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font: 7pt "Times New Roman"; margin: 0px;">
</span></span></span><span style="font-family: "calibri";"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">An
Improved O-Line. </b>Although the offensive line has been pretty effective at
opening space for the running game it’s been completely awful at protecting
quarterback Kenny Pickett. At this point, given that this team probably wasn’t
making a run at a national, ACC or probably Coastal title, the primary
objective should be protecting the franchise QB. Should they do that, who
knows? Maybe a receiver accidentally wanders to the wrong spot on the field and
gets open. One can only hope. </span></div>
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<span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "calibri";">4.</span><span style="font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font: 7pt "Times New Roman"; margin: 0px;">
</span></span></span><span style="font-family: "calibri";"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Secondary.
</b>The pass defense looked shaky in spurts against Albany and then was
completely exposed – again – versus Penn State. James Franklin is an
unscrupulous clown who isn’t nearly as smart as he believes, but give him
credit for continuing to expose our weakness. Should things continue this will
be the third friggin’ season of a questionable secondary. The good news is that
Pitt plays a run-heavy option offense that was last popular when Dwight
Eisenhower was President. The bad news is, in many instances, that hasn’t
always mattered. Making average passers look NFL quality is a Pitt tradition
which needs to stop. </span></div>
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<span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: "calibri";">5.</span><span style="font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font: 7pt "Times New Roman"; margin: 0px;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-family: "calibri";"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">A Reason For Hope</b>.
Most of us don’t have any after last week. Most of us saw last week’s game as a
measuring stick – not simply for where Pitt is in comparison to Penn State, but
to nationally relevant programs – and have deep concerns about the play calls,
player development and recruiting. Pitt need’s a solid performance Saturday,
not just for it’s own self-esteem, but to give its fan base, recruits and
administration a glimmer of hope that the boat isn’t sinking. One more pants
shitting could cause insurmountable turmoil – which is great for snark
factories like this one but not-so-great for anyone else. </span></div>
<b></b><i></i><u></u><sub></sub><sup></sup><strike></strike><span style="font-family: "calibri";"></span>Paul Rhoads' Pogo Ballhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09518115137577464632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-69389355944389103852018-09-11T21:48:00.002-04:002018-09-11T21:48:36.432-04:00<div align="center">
<strong><u>News In Brief: Narduzzi's Dog Gives Verbal Commitment to PSU</u></strong></div>
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Blawnox (PR) -- It has not been a good week for Pitt football head coach Pat Narduzzi. </div>
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The embattled coach watched as his team was blown out Saturday night at home against Penn State, 51-6. Three days later, local recruiting target Joey Porter Jr. announced that he had committed to the Nittany Lions. </div>
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Now, it appears another Narduzzi commitment has bolted the program, with the family's dog - Penni - announcing earlier today that she too is planning on enrolling at Penn State next year. </div>
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"I just can't wait to get on that grass near Old Main and do my business, ya know," the dog said in a Twitter statement Tuesday afternoon. </div>
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Penni, 7 (49 in dog years), stated that she chose PSU because of its large rural campus as well as the large variety of "quality bitches." Penni had been leaning towards staying committed to Pitt but was discouraged by the events of Saturday night's game. </div>
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"I'm in my seat with the rest of the recruits and all of these people around us are yelling, 'siddahn.' So I did and no one pet me and said 'good girl,'" Penni Said. "They just looked around for more people to yell at." </div>
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Paul Rhoads' Pogo Ballhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09518115137577464632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-54437178212722607212018-09-10T23:46:00.003-04:002018-09-10T23:46:44.715-04:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<strong><u>PSU Fan Still Salty From "We Are" Snub in Drug Store</u></strong></div>
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McCandless (PR) -- With a 51-6 trouncing of in-state rival Pitt Saturday night at Heinz Field, Penn State fans were in a celebratory mood. <br />
Well, all except one fan. <br />
Sitting in his Shaler home Monday afternoon in a white Nike pullover with the PSU logo on the chest, 37-year-old Tyler Dodson is still smarting from the snub he received by an alleged fellow Nittany Lions fan at the CVS on McKnight Road Saturday afternoon. According to sources, Dodson was walking through a middle section of the store when he encountered a white female in a Penn State hooded sweatshirt. Upon seeing the female, Dodson yelled out "we are," expecting the woman to gleefully reply, "Penn State!" <br />
Instead, the woman stared for a moment and then walked to the nail polish section. <br />
"Bro, like, what the fuck?" Dodson said while cracking open a third Red Bull in less than 20 minutes. "Everyone knows that. And it's gameday. If you don't want random strangers yelling at you then getting mad when you don't follow along with your ritualistic nonsense, why are you wearing school colors?"<br />
The two would encounter each other again while both people were paying for their respective items. Feeling like she may not have heard him the first time, Dodson again yelled out. This time, the woman paid for her bottled water and hair shampoo and simply left the building without acknowledging the man. Dodson planned to confront the woman in the parking lot but the unknown female had already left by the time he had finished paying for his Red Bull, AXE body spray, AXE body wash, AXE deodorant and hair gel. <br />
Dodson insists he's not upset with the female's apathy, but is simply confused by it. <br />
"I mean, it's like, whatever," he said. "She's probably a lesbian anyways." Paul Rhoads' Pogo Ballhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09518115137577464632noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-60736850618794371422018-09-10T15:34:00.000-04:002018-09-10T15:35:12.049-04:00Hello Darkness My Old Friend<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 9.0pt;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Hello darkness, my old
friend<br />
I've come to watch us lose again<br />
Because losses we are reaping<br />
Leave me in a state of weeping<br />
And the old depression that was in my brain<br />
Still remains<br />
Within the sound of Pitt football<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">In my Pitt script I
walked alone<br />
Staring blankly at my phone<br />
‘Neath fluorescent sign of the Dirty “0”<br />
I didn’t see Cathy’s lights in their victory glow <br />
When my eyes were stabbed by the game's highlights<br />Gave me fright<br />
And touched the sound of Pitt football<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">And at the next game
at Heinz I saw <br />
Ten thousand people, and no way more<br />
Fans sitting and not cheering<br />
People hearing "Sweet Caroline" and not singing<br />
People writing cheers that voices never share<br />
And no one dared<br />
Disturb the sound of Pitt football<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Fools, said I, you
fans do not know<br />
Losses like a cancer always grow<br />
Hear my words that I might teach you<br />
Take my “Toof” hat that I might reach you<br />
But my words, like a quick-kick fell<br />
And echoed in the wells of Pitt football<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">And the people bowed and
prayed<br />
To Pitt script color change they made<br />
And the script gave out its warning<br />
In the words that it was forming<br />
And the script said, that Narduzzi’s words are written in Cathy’s bathroom stalls<br />
And David Lawrence Hall<br />
And whispered in the sounds of Pitt football</span>Wlat 3:16http://www.blogger.com/profile/12628862261761216257noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-10770510181015597852014-10-05T22:23:00.001-04:002014-10-05T22:23:43.788-04:002014 College Football Munson Rankings: Week 7<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Most of you college football fans have gone from hope for your team's great season to having nothing left but to root against your bitter rival, or revel in someone else's pain. Some of you root for schools who really have no chance, so you really just root against people you hate the most. And some of you are just straight up miserable bastards.<div>
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For those of you who may fit into one of those categories or have different reasons, I decided to cut through the crap and just rank team's based on their Munsonness. That is, their ability to screw things up despite having the ability to be successful. I'll use some liberal definitions for the top 25 rankings but you'll get the idea. So let's go through our rankings after week 6 of games.</div>
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#25: University of Kansas: I know you aren't a football school. We all get that you're really just trying to field a serviceable team so you can maintain membership status in a conference that will allow your basketball team to compete. But Charlie Weiss? And you didn't fire him in the off-season and bring him back, only to fire him a month into the season. You had some momentum after Mangino; but now look at you. Sad.</div>
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#24: UMass: At first glance, they don't seem like a school who had it going for them but then screwed up. But they did. They were doing just fine in I-AA/whatever the acronym is now. It's a state that cares more about Ted Williams' head being on ice than football. In fact, college football comes in just after curling for these guys. "Hey, let's bump up to D-1, play in a conference full of midwestern dopes and hope it goes well." Well, it hasn't. You're 0-6 and probably losing more money than it's worth.</div>
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#23: Washington State: You're the PAC-12 redneck school. In fact, the only real one. You can get any redneck recruit in the entire pacific time zone. And there are low expectations. I actually commend you for trying something different with Mike Leach but you're obviously cursed. Hire an exorcist, not a football coach.</div>
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#22: Boise State: Blue grass isn't so cool when you aren't winning. You had a good thing going; then you got cocky and your boy-genius left you. And you weren't prepared. For shame!</div>
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#21: Pitt: 3-0, then 3-3 after this week. Losing to a school who's fans take pride in dressing up for a football game (UVA) is unacceptable.</div>
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#20: Stanford: You had a good time there for a few years. Yeah, it was great. The smart kid getting the hot chics. Now, you're just an annoying nerd again. Congrats.</div>
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#19: Maryland: I don't even know where to start. Such a disaster. A veritable cornucopia of imbecilic management. You can't even get the good kids from the best DC school, which is one mile away, to take official visits. Losing to UNC at home by 6 isn't quite the same as getting gang-raped by Ohio State at home, now is it?</div>
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#18: Uconn: Just a few years ago you get to a BCS bowl. Then, for reasons unknown, you hire Paul Pasqualoni. I don't even know who the coach is now and I don't care. You're 1-4 in whatever that D2 conference you're in. Don't act as if you don't have the money to compete, either. Cheap bastards.</div>
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#17: Virginia Tech: We should pull all of our best scientists right now. The ones studying cancer, lasers, cheap dick pills, etc. Move them all over to a giant institute to figure you out. Sadly, they would not find success. #goiter.</div>
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#16: Oklahoma: Welcome to the rankings. We think you'll be rising rapidly.</div>
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#15: Miami, FL: I really think you've got a great chance to finish in the top 5 this year. We just need one more scandal and a few more losses. Do us proud.</div>
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#14: North Carolina: See Miami. I put you ahead of them simply because you seem to act as if you're above all of this. Arrogant bitches.</div>
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#13: UCLA: "Hey, I had the world by the tail and blew another terrible lead and will finish the season smoking meth outside the Holiday Bowl. Yayyyy!!!"</div>
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#12: Wisconsin: If you're Wisconsin and you lose to Northwestern, then you Muson'ed hard-core.</div>
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#11: Colorado: Many of you will say, "that's way to high for CU." No it's not. Not even close. This school has everything going for it, including legal weed. You'd think they'd get every recruit they wanted. You'd think it wouldn't be that hard to at least come close to what they did with McCartney. But they can't. Not even close. Your biggest, and last win of, the year, was against a Hawaii team who literally said, "We don't care if we play football or not."</div>
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#10: Alabama: Everything was going so great. It really was. The multiple national championships. All-Americans. And then you Kiffin'ed. And guess what happens when you Kiffen? You lose to Ole Miss because your offense sucks. If you were a stock in the Munson stock exchange, you'd be a solid "buy."</div>
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#9: Penn State: Didn't even play this week but you're in the top 10. Just like Wisconsin, you get ranked for losing to Northwestern. But there are just so many other reasons to have you on this list. The jokes are too easy...for now.</div>
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#8: Florida: Sitting at 3-1 isn't bad. It's just the way you've done it. You're Florida. University of Florida. You are getting stomped in your backyard, in every category, by a guy named Jimbo.</div>
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#7: Oregon: Let's have a real discussion: Oregon isn't the flashiest state or have the best players. However, they are essentially Nike University. They have the resources to get anything they want. That is, except a national championship. Oregon is the kid in school whose dad is really rich. But he still can't get a decent chic to go out with him, doesn't get the best grades, and dresses like a tranny.</div>
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#6: Georgia: You might be the ultimate Munson. All the great recruiting classes. The weight rooms, the campus, etc. Everything is in your favor, except winning when it counts.</div>
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#5: Florida State: Yes, you are undefeated. Yes, you may win the national championship. And yes, Jameis Winston will be working at car wash in 3 years or less. This is a team that has everything going for it, with a terrible schedule and they look as if they can lose to anyone, any given week.</div>
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#4: Louisiana State: Eating grass and going for it on 4th and 19 is super cool when you win. When it's not, you're just a dumb cow. We're all looking forward to the epic matchup against Florida to tell us the school who has the true heart of Munson.</div>
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#3: Southern California: You fire Kiffen for a just as stupid ex-coordinator. You lose to Boston College? Ok - we all make mistakes. But that effort on the hail Mary defending ASU shows you the heart that team has under Sark. Good luck for the next 3 years until you can actually fire him.</div>
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#2: Texas: You might finish the season #1. You're TX: the biggest and, by far, the most loved team in the most football-crazed state. And this is the best you can do? Don't tell me about Mack Brown and what he screwed up. You still have more talent than almost anyone on the schedule. And Charlie Strong wasn't even close to the best coach you could've gotten.</div>
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#1: Michigan: This situation right now is the definition of Munson. You are #1 and will probably run the rest of the season. The best reason is that not only will the head coach go down, but probably the Athletic Director. Giving away free tickets for buying a soda? This is simply as fun to watch as many of us have ever witnessed in college football. Congrats.</div>
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Wlat 3:16http://www.blogger.com/profile/12628862261761216257noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-73725211568685500282013-08-29T22:37:00.001-04:002013-08-30T07:43:12.302-04:00Pittsburgh Panthers 2013 Game by Game Preview<i><u>Blawnox, PA</u></i> - As a long-time independent and a 20 year run in an also-ran conference of meatballs, Pitt finally enters into a legitimate conference. In their first year in the ACC, the pundits picked Pitt to finish 5th in their division. But let's get a little more specific and outline exactly how, and why, the games will end up. The season officially begins in a few short days so let's get started there.<br />
<br />
1. Florida State @ Pittsburgh: Both teams are starting a new QB. FSU loses EJ Manuel to the first round of the NFL and Pitt loses Tino Sunseri to the Galapagos turtle colony. On defense, Pitt returns 9 starters with 2 of them being actually decent players and the rest a bunch of mediocre cheeseballs. FSU has a bunch of over-hyped, over-recruiter, poorly coached cheeseballs so this is a push. In the end, Pitt is as Pitt does and they fumble at the one yard line going in for the winning score in the 4th quarter. Also, it's a big game with a national tv audience at home...so there's that. <br />
Final result: FSU: 20, Pitt: 16.<br />
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2. New Mexico @ Pittsburgh: Pitt starts out slow, which is a bad sign. New Mexico blocks a punt and scores from the 10 yard line. They return a kickoff for a TD. Pitt QB, Tom Savage, is replaced in the 3rd quarter by a bucket of chicken (through praying to both Joboo and Colonel Sanders), who brings the team back from a 17-3 deficit to 17-13 by the end of the 4th quarter. A defensive lapse leaves Pitt on a 4th and 1 but confusion on the sideline leads to not calling the timeout. The game clock strikes zero with both the field goal unit and the starting offense on the field, with confused faces and hands in the air.<br />
Result: UNM: 20, Pitt 17.<br />
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3. Pittsburgh @ Duke: A late season hurricane passes through North Carolina leaving a mess on the field. In front of 12 total fans, Duke returns a fumbled punt in the 2nd quarter for a 7-0 lead. Pitt, with several open scholarships after several more players quitting the team, signs 2 Mallard ducks at half-time to the squad (team names them: Donald and Daffy). Donald takes the reigns under center with Daffy in the backfield. Running the Pistol, they move down the field easily to tie the score at 7-7. Unfortunately, a redneck fan shoots both ducks and Tom Savage returns to the field for Pitt. Eventually, Duke gets in a field goal and wins the game. The teams come together afterward for a post-game duck meal.<br />
Result: Duke: 10, Pitt 7.<br />
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4. Virginia @ Pittsburgh: In strange fashion, Virginians come to work in Western Pennsylvania for the first time since 1857 versus the traditional WPA person going to Virginia. Virginia, as is their standard operating procedure, acts snooty at their hotel. The starting QB gets punched out by a Yinzer at the McDonald's at Station Square but ends up able to play. UVA starts the game, trying to give it away with 3 turnovers in the first half. Pitt, being the cordial hosts, gives up 4 turnovers in the first half. Heading into the first quarter, Pitt is granted 3 points by new NCAA rules that allow the home team a few points if they're complete idiots. So with Pitt winning 3-0, they pooch-kick the opening kickoff, which is returned for a TD, thereby proving that Gdo hates Pitt, also proving that Pitt is stupid, regardless of coach or administration. Eventually, UVA just runs the ball straight at a beleaguered Pitt defense and scores on a 1 yard TD where the Pitt defense is distracted by singing "Sweet Caroline."<br />
Result: UVA: 10, Pitt 3<br />
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5. Pittsburgh @ VA Tech: Starting their ACC opening season 0-4, Pitt is looking for some hope. Luckily, it's "bitch" is 5th on the schedule. Pitt shows up on Friday in Blacksburg and the players take to campus. They bring booze, weed, and no condoms. Nine months later, Hokie-nation is spitting out newborns who speak "Yinzer-ease," and no one understands what's going on. Game time starts and in typical fashion, Pitt pistol-whips the Hokies early and often. It will be the best game of the season, as always.<br />
Result: Pitt, 38, VA Tech, 17.<br />
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6. Old Dominion @ Pittsburgh: In typical fashion, Pitt is losing to a I-AA team for most of the game. Pitt takes the opening drive for an early lead but quickly fall to 7-10 and the shoot-out is on. ODU's QB, a kid who actually doesn't even know the rules of football or quite how to play it, throws for 400 yards and 4 td's. ODU is up by 5 late but the dumb ODU QB throws a pick-6 with 2 minutes remaining to save Pitt from the embarrassment of 2 straight seasons of I-AA losses.<br />
Result: Pitt, 42, ODU, 40.<br />
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7. Pittsburgh @ Navy: Feeling some momentum, Pitt travels to Naptown against the Middies. They have a Goat mascot, which makes zero sense for a bunch of sailors, but I digress. The Middies do their usual stuff, and Pitt can actually run the ball WITHOUT fumbling. In remembrance of Barbara Bush, it turns ugly and Pitt takes control of the game.<br />
Result: Pitt, 38, Navy, 20.<br />
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8. Pittsburgh @ GA TECH: GT is a really nice bunch of guys. And the team plays the same type of offense as Navy, only against dumber players. Pitt uses the same game plan but feels bad so fumbles a few times to make it interesting. But end up getting back to .500.<br />
Result: Pitt, 38, GT, 28.<br />
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9. Notre Dame @ Pittsburgh: Notre Dame enters the game 9-0 and ranked #2 in the country. The Priests can smell both, the young boys within 2 miles of the stadium and another BCS Championship game. In typical Pitt fashion, they play their best in a game they have no business doing so. The Irish, after paying off the refs at half-time and getting gift calls, pull close. But the Pitt players retaliate by having their way with the ND cheerleaders, thereby leading to total protonic reversal. Professor Venkman studies the resulting DNA samplings and concludes that this magic sauce was first created when Slimer mated with Sigourney Weaver. The game ends when a giant marshmallow scores Pitt's final TD.<br />
Result: Pitt, 27, ND, 24.<br />
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10. North Carolina @ Pittsburgh; Pitt's 5 game winning streak is like, the longest of all time. That may not be exactly right but it's probably close. Or something. The football Gods look down and are like, "Wait, wtf - who was managing this? Pitt doesn't win 5 in a row." The Gods take control and Pitt makes some decisions like, trying the swinging gate after a TD, they try the pistol with Tom Savage (slow white guy), and never stop. On defense, they put 12 guys in the box multiple times (Todd Thomas is told he's the 12th guy on the field and thinks it's a new trend by the Seattle Seahawks that is legal; Pitt sets an NCAA record for most "too many jackasses on the field" penalties in one game). They lose in epic fashion in front of a nice crowd, who all leave mid 2nd quarter.<br />
Result: UNC - 44, Pitt, 16.<br />
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11. Pittsburgh @ Syracuse. I'm going to warn you: Troy Nunes is in attendance...and he's pissed. The Orange enter the game 1-9. They've got Pasqualoni on speed-dial. They're questioning their Judaism, citrus in general, and living in Hoth (Cuse gets more snow than anyone in the Continental 48). But all is well as the Panthers are in town. And they know, nothing is more lethal to a Panther than Nunes' Musk. The SU players have that musk on their jerseys, shoes, gloves, etc. Like Miley Cyrus, this game is ugly.<br />
Result: SU, 34, Pitt, 12.<br />
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12: Miami @ Pittsburgh: Everyone is shocked that the NCAA has allowed UM to actually play football. Their collection of mark-ass marks, trick-ass marks, punk-ass bitches, and skip-scap skanks, and skallywags, hoes, heifers, hee-hops, and hoolyhoops, present a tough matchup for the Panthers. But it's cold in Pittsburgh this time of year. And Pitt's Head Coach, Paul Chryst, has ordered reinforcements of Wisconsin cheddar. The cheese is like spinach for Popeye, and the Pitt players neutralize both the trick-ass marks, punk-ass bitches, AND the heifers on UM's team to regain the lead and hold on for the win.<br />
Result: <br />
Pitt, 26, Miami, 24.<br />
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Pitt ends the season 6-6, fingers crossed for the Tire or Crappy Birginham Bowl. But more importantly, the 6-6 record leaves fans with 9 months of arguing that the team is trending higher than .500 or lower. Bet well, my friends.Wlat 3:16http://www.blogger.com/profile/12628862261761216257noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-53656060180030451052013-07-01T14:06:00.000-04:002013-07-01T14:06:01.380-04:00Updated Open Letter to ACC<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<i>Blawnox, PA</i> - Dear Friends,<br />
<br />
Today is a great day for the University of Pittsburgh. We are now all grown up and legitimate. Being in the Big East felt like being the bastard child of the town slut and Eddie the use car salesman. I mean, we knowingly associated with WVU. Knowingly! It's been over a year since that ended and I still feel dirty.<br />
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So we last reached out to you, almost two years ago (post below). Our intention at the time was to say, "Thank you." And we remain thankful to be associated with such a good group of schools. However, some things have changed in those two years.<br />
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First off, the conference is much different. Gone will be Maryland. Joining Pitt and Syracuse are Notre Dame and Louisville. So in the spirit of accuracy, we feel we need to provide our thoughts to those new schools along with updating our previous stances on you guys. And now that we're officially in the conference, we're going to be pretty honest with some of you. We kind of feel as if we met on that first date a couple years ago and then some of you just let yourselves go. You know the feeling: you start dating a size 6 and two years later she's a size 12. Well, there are consequences for such behavior. And to be fair, some of you have really improved yourselves. So there's credit to give out. But enough with the explanations - let's get going.<br />
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1. University of Maryland: Alright, I've only got so much time for you. So many issues but you know that size 6 to 12 analogy I made? That doesn't apply to you. You're more like the size 6 to 18. You're just stupid. Look at yourself - just look at what you've become. "Oh, I have a great idea - I'll play shitty football for 100+ years in a crappy conference where no one really cares about football; and then go join a big conference who only cares about football, corn, and rust (in that order)." How dumb are you guys? We used to feel a kinship with you - now I'm just embarrassed that we share a border. Do you know what Minnesota is like in January? Have fun being the shit stain on the Fat 10's underpants. Dummies. Oh, and lacrosse is for douchebags.<br />
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2. North Carolina State University: Where have you been hiding? You don't call; you don't write. Do they have internet in that part of the South? Or did you forget to pay your Comcast bill? With all the problems at UNC, we would've thought you'd try to capitalize. I mean, how could a school with it's big in-state rival going through massive turmoil not make a big splash and seize the opportunity to gain new fans? I just can't imagine this sort of thing happening in another place, where the school colors of said rival are also blue and white. Wait - shit, I just caught myself in a mirror. Nevermind.<br />
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3. Wake Forest: I still don't know who you are and still don't care. You're colors are "shit' brown - wtf, dude? $50K per year to attend a school that's sole mission is to teach you how to market cigarettes - good grief. I've seen you out in the neighborhood; wearing Ralph Lauren at a Kenny Chesney concert is just tacky. But you don't care - you're head is so far up your ass that you could live in San Francisco. Dork.<br />
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4. Georgia Tech: Is it me or have you lost weight? Listen, I really appreciate the Birthday card but you're too much. You're just so nice, and smart. Could be a little funnier but that's ok. I've been meaning to tell you that I really feel bad about your BB team - I don't know what's going on there but you'll get better, because you're such a good guy. Stick with the white football helmets. Seriously, you're our favorite (don't tell anyone we said that though).<br />
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5. University of Virginia: Hey, great job killing off that poor Lacrosse girl. And here we thought you were cool. Well, I take that back - you're an asswipe. And you've gotten cockier. Let me just tell you that, yes, we are jealous of you. I mean, good Lord, there are 40 wineries within 30 minutes of your campus. And Charlottesville is tremendous. And your school is pretty good. Yes, I'm jealous - is that what you fucking wanted to hear? You don't have to be a dick about it. Still, though, if having all that means you have to wear a tie and shirt to a football game, I'm out. That's just the douchiest thing ever. I mean, of ALL FUCKING TIME. There's no crying in baseball and there are no ties in football, you douche!<br />
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6. Syracuse University: Well, buddy, we're in. I don't know how we pulled this off. Did you let Swofford bang Mrs. Boeheim or something? I mean, how the hell did we convince these guys that Syracuse and Pittsburgh have: a) good football programs, and b) decent winter weather? Those guys really are stupid; or maybe we're just brilliant. Whatever - good seeing you here. Now don't do something to screw it up because we both know we can't afford the exit fee. What's that? You're no longer in the Association of American Universities? Shit.<br />
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7. Boston College: Fuck you assholes. We still hate you and always will. Your colors suck, your town sucks, your school sucks, and your religion sucks. Everything about you has always sucked and always will. In fact, they found an ancient Egyptian temple with hieroglyphics all over that say, "Boston College Sucks." Nostradamus' lost works say that Boston College will suck forever. Your suckiness transcends space and time. You even smell bad - take a bath you freak. Oh, and Boston Cream Pie is about the worst desert ever.<br />
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8. Florida State University: On our first date, you were wearing a size 10 dress; and you still are today. I don't know what that says but it's probably, "ok." I don't know if I should like you, hate you, feel bad for you, or what. You dress up a white guy in Indian gear as a mascot - that's just so stupid; like, West Virginia stupid. But then you have those hot chics - I have to give you credit there. But then there's Jimbo Fisher and I'm like, "What the fuck?! You guys actually think he's a good coach??!!!" Maybe I should just wait to pass judgment. So be on notice: you are being evaluated at all times.<br />
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9. Notre Dame: Oh for God's sakes - just when we thought we were away from your creepiness, you're back in. You're like those pedophile Priests who get moved from Parish to Parish, creeping out a whole new set of kids. Did you know that we had to send everyone in the Conference to training on how to deal with you in the workplace? You're like an HR nightmare, you weirdo. I could tolerate this arrangement if you joined for football. But of course, NOOOOOO, you wouldn't do that. Oh, Brian Kelly is a murderer, by the way. And I'm pretty sure Mike Bray is too; I just don't have evidence...yet.<br />
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10. Clemson University: Look, this redneck thing is going a little overboard. It was funny at first. Just look at your dopey mascot's outfit - the thing looks like it was made by the Special Ed kids in Home Ec class. Have some self-respect. And Crocs aren't considered appropriate attire for a wedding. Listen, I'm not perfect either - have you seen my gut? I'm honestly trying to help. But what I'm saying is visiting the dentist twice a year wouldn't hurt. What kind of name is Dabo, anyway? You've got a lot of potential - you really do. And this is despite living in a State who's Governor is a complete immoral retard and they STILL voted him back into politics. But you've got to clean it up, just a little. Drink Budweiser instead of Milwaukee's Best, for God's sakes. And get the '67 Impala on blocks off your front yard.<br />
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11. University of North Carolina: Boy, oh boy, how the mighty have fallen. You remind me of Amanda Bynes: all nice and proper, things were going great, then you ran into the smack or something. Good grief. I think Roy Williams' basketball IQ dropped 50 points since we last talked. And for some reason, you think you're good enough to cheat and get away with it. You're not. And to think I used to respect you. Look at you now - I bet you have a bottle of vodka in your desk drawer right now. I'm trying to be your friend here - it's time for an intervention. 28 days in rehab and I think you'll be on the straight and narrow. But you have to want it; I can't do it for you.<br />
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12. University of Louisville: You're dumb and hot. Simple as that. Not much substance, no character, no personality. Just teased hair, fake boobs, high heels, and a thong bikini. You'll always have a job - someone will hire you to do SOMETHING. And I have to respect that - you use what you have. And sadly, you beat us in pretty much everything so who am I to look down on you. Still, you ARE dumb. That's ok - we're ugly and I'd take hot over ugly any day. Congrats.<br />
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13. Duke University: oh, your'e such an annoying little shit. Pompous little bitch. I know you got a perfect score on your SAT but you still have to get along with people in life. Maybe I'm not the smartest, or the richest, but I know how to have a good time with just about anyone. You? Yeah, you make more than me, and you live in that fancy house, and your wife has a great rack and the personal trainer keeps her in great shape. But you know what, my plus sized wife can beat her up if it comes to that. And my wife, will drink a beer and doesn't roll her eyes when I fart. So fuck you. Yes, you're better than me. But kiss my ass you prick.<br />
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14. Virginia Tech University: Meh - how can I hate you when I completely own you. I said it two years ago: even at your best you can't beat us. Fast forward to September 2012: Pitt loses it's opener to fucking Youngstown State. Did you hear me? Youngs-fucking-town State! What happens next? We cream your dopey team. What the hell is the matter with you? We suck - really, we can't do shit right in football? We can't even hire a Coach who lasts longer than 10 minutes. And we STILL kick your ass up and down the field.<br />
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Well, anyway, I really have no beef with you. It'd be like hating on a kid with Down's Syndrome. I'll just pat you on the head when you walk by and buy you a lollipop.<br />
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15. University of Miami: Just when I thought you were going to crawl back into your hole forever, you go out and get a decent BB team. You're like a friggin' cochroach - why won't you die? I suppose I'll have to take joy in the fact that your football program is done forever. Face it - that shit isn't coming back. You could get all of Michael Irvin's cocaine to power that engine back on but it's just not going to happen. I saw some National Geographic thing where it said most of the greater Miami area will be under water in 50 years due to rising sea levels. I just smiled and thought of your crappy school being washed away. But then I remembered that you really are a cockroach. Oh, yeah, one more thing - the pharmacy called to remind you that your VD medicine is ready for pick-up - stop hooking up with Jamaican prostitutes you nasty mother-fucker.<br />
<br />
---Yours truly,<br />
University of PittsburghWlat 3:16http://www.blogger.com/profile/12628862261761216257noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-47198279885888896462012-09-03T14:39:00.000-04:002012-09-03T14:39:00.943-04:00Paul Chryst Press Conference, Makes Apology and Offer<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<i>Blawnox</i> - University of Pittsburgh Head Football Coach, Paul Chryst, held an unusual weekly press conference this afternoon. As most media expected, Coach Chryst took full responsbility for the display of the Panther football team on Saturday night at Heinz Field. "First, I want to congratulate the Youngstown State team for a great effort. They gave us more than we could handle."<br />
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Next, Coach Chryst sought to apologize. "Now, I know many of you are upset with us. I can understand that. Let me just say, that this sort of thing will never happen again." This reporter asked, "What will you do to ensure that?"<br />
<br />Coach Chryst retorted, "Well, we have to control what we can control. And for me, that is affecting every single Pitt fan I can. That's who we're ultimately serving. So let me apologize to all of those who were not in attendance, who I didn't get to kick square in the nuts at the game. Normally I wouldn't make concessions but this was an extraordinary event, plus the weather, and suspensions. I feel I need to do more." Chryst stared directly at those in attendance; tearing up a little, he said, "I just feel terrible that I couldn't kick more of you, as hard as I possibly could, straight and dead-on in the balls on Saturday night."<br />
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He continued, "So for any Pitt fan holding an unused game ticket from the Youngstown State game, we will be allotting as much time as it takes for all the fans to come down after practice on Tuesday, September 4th. Each fan, holding an unused game ticket, will get a gigantic kick in the balls from me, the Head Coach."<br />
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A reporter from the AP asked, "What is the policy for having more than one unused game ticket - will you give two kicks for those individuals?"<br /><br />"Sorry, only one kick per ticket holder. However, again, because of how roundly I kicked those fans in the nuts at the game itself, we've decided to make sure everyone gets what's coming to them. So if you have more than one ticket, you can redeem a second to get kicked again but that would be by Coach Huxtable," stated Chryst. "But we'd really hope that you'd donate those unused tickets to another great Panther fan."<br /><br />"What time do the lots open for the nut-kicking? And can I use my season parking pass at the Southside Practice Complex?," questioned a local fan.<br />
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Athletic Director, Steve Pedersen, stepped to the podium to field the answer. "As is tradition for the games, the lots will open 5 hours prior to the end of practice. The Flow Band will be on site to provide entertainment along with free Face Painting for kids under 12. Parking passes will not be valid. Parking costs will be $15 for the Fage Fozio, "Original Nut Destroyer" lot; $10 for the Paul Hacket, "The Nut Kill of Cardiac Hill" lot; and $5 for the shuttle from campus. The shuttle ride will cost an additional $3.95 from campus but will include a good kick in the balls by the shuttle driver."<br />
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"And let me further clarify, "added Pedersen, "that any Panther Club member who gives more than $10,000 per year, qualifies for an additional ball kicking by myself. And those with more than $100,000 in giving per year will receive a nut-kicking from their choice of Mark Nordenberg, Jerry Cochrane, or former Chancellor, J Dennis O'Connor."Wlat 3:16http://www.blogger.com/profile/12628862261761216257noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-56641382347397925162012-05-25T13:02:00.003-04:002012-05-25T13:02:44.210-04:00Pitt Basketball Silences Critics with National Championship<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Things are a lot calmer around the Pederson Events Centers these days. School's out so there no reason for things not to be. I guess we're talking more about the Pitt Basketball team. A team that got caught in a storm, but was able to sail for calmer waters. <br /><br />Critics of Pitt Basketball say many things. Jamie Dixon is a bad hire, Jamie can't recruit, and Jamie is living off the Ben Howland era. Nearly ten years later, Dixon is still at Pitt. Ben Howland has been gone for a long time and we can say this is Jamie Dixon's program. As for recruiting, Dixon has landed his share of great players such as Levance Fields, Sam Young, Dejuan Blair, Gilbert Brown, and the list will go on. <br /><br /><br />The biggest question Dixon faced from his critics is would he ever be able to reach a Final Four let alone win a national title with his system? <br /><br />It didn't look that way at the start of the 2011-2012 season. Pitt's season started with a loss to Long Beach State in just the third game of the season. The Panthers would recover to win the next 8 games to be at 11-1. Their world would turn upside down starting late December when they lost 8 straight games to be at 11-9. During that time, Pitt would also lose a player and be without another. Freshman Khem Birch would leave Pitt taking his blonde streak and diva-like attitude with him. Tray Woodall was hurt most the season putting Ashton Gibbs in a bad spot and no depth at point guard. <br /><br />Despite all that, Pitt was able to pull it together and earn another spot in postseason play. An upset over Princeton, gave Pitt their first Final Four since the 1940's. This would silence the critics about the Final Four, but they would also question if Dixon could bring home a national title to Pitt. To reach that debate, Pitt would face Butler in a rematch from last year's second round matchup where Nasir Robinson fouled that hippy looking douchebag with seconds left on the clock. <br /><br /> Pitt and Butler played two brutal halves where both teams kept exchanging punches. They would end up in overtime where Pitt eventually pulled away. Players like JJ Moore and Talib Zanna stepped up their games. Lamar Patterson would have his coming out party. Along with Travon Woodall, these players would lead Pitt to a National Championship by dismantling Washington State.<br /><br />
You can see why it's so calm at the Pete. No critics, No drama, No hair dye, and No divas. The only noise you may hear is from the practices at Pitt Basketball. They are gearing up for another storm and this time they will be bringing it...and hopefully a back-to-back National Championship. Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-41303324218048475872012-05-24T10:27:00.001-04:002012-05-24T10:27:15.088-04:00NAMBLA Offers to Sponsor Big Ten Title Game<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The Big Ten is picking up where it left off after a captivating title game that sent Brett Bielema and the Wisconsin Badgers to choke in another BCS Bowl game. After the events that surfaced at Penn State regarding Jerry Sandusky and the recent events of a sex offender stalking...err recruiting young football players, NAMBLA has offered their support for the Big Ten Conference and would like to sponsor next year's title game. <br />
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One Big Ten spokesperson said that "We have not heard anything from NAMBLA, but if it involves money we will talk. No one thought we would expand to 12 members without Ohio State and and Michigan bitching about attention being taken away from their stupid rivalry game." <br />Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-82076703050088887442012-05-24T09:55:00.001-04:002012-05-24T09:55:45.934-04:00Pitt, Cincinnati Form Bowl Partnership<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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With Pitt possibly heading to the ACC after 2012, there was concern that their annual rivalry game against Cincinnati will also end as well. Well, think again. The River City Rivalry Trophy will not find its way at yard sales, people basements, etc. Instead, it will become an innovator to another premium ticket in the post season wars of College Football.<br />
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Pitt and Cincinnati have agreed to form a bowl partnership starting in 2013. This means if neither team is in the BCS Bowl, both of these teams will meet in their own bowl game. The payout is rumored to be 50 million dollars. Home Field will be rotated yearly. If neither team meets that year, that money gets pooled into next year's bowl game if they meet. <br />
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Pitt released this statement this morning in regards to the bowl game:<br />
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"With the landscape of College Football changing everyday with conference expansions, conference bowl partnerships, and superconferences, it is in the University's best interests to look out for their athletic programs. This is why we have formed a bowl partnership with Cincinnati. We were in discussions with West Virginia, but we decided if we wanted to deal with a bunch of drunken hicks we'd go to a Toby Keith concert instead." <br />
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Cincinnati released this statement:<br />
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"We're exited to keep the River City Rivalry going. Pitt has given us every opportunity to stay nationally relevant in someway and they have come through for us again." <br />
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There's been concerns of where they the money will come from to host this game. Bowl Officials are in talks with WKRP, Skyline Chili, Krogers, Giant Eagle, Heinz, and others to fund this Bowl game. All feel they will get a positive investment from one of the greatest games in College Football. <br />
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<br />Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-87890785367211286272012-02-17T18:25:00.002-05:002012-02-17T18:32:57.176-05:00The Day He Got PunkedIt's been over a month since Pitt Football concluded their season. Another season, another coach. You have to feel for the seniors who pretty much had their college careers end on this note. You have to feel for the current players who still have to endure the mess. <br /><br />One person you don't have to feel for? That person is Pitt's AD Steve Pederson. <br /><br />I don't blame Pederson for what happened with Mike Haywood. He doesn't have a crystal ball and there's no way he knew Haywood would go Ike Turner on the mother of his child. The firing of Dave Wannstedt was a mess, but we don't know what happened in their offseason meeting. Based on Dave's actions since he was let go, blame goes on both sides. <br /><br />A lot Graham's dirty laundry got aired out after his firing. It seems Todd had his own "vision", his own "philosophy", and he had his own "traditions". Unfortunately, he didn't seem to respect the visions and philosophies of others. He also sure as hell didn't respect traditions either, whether it related to Pitt Football or even Steelers football. He cared about his own. In the end, it was about Todd Graham<br /><br />It comes to no surprise as to why Pederson may have been a little shook up by his employee leaving even though he told him no. That Day, he became a victim of his own creation. In some ways when hired Todd Graham, he hired himself. Worst of all, he got punked. <br /><br />As Pitt starts out with a new coach and another new attitude, maybe Pederson can start anew as well. Pitt will head into the ACC and stakes will be raised. Pitt will have to step up its game because the results have been mixed in the Big East. Let's hope it works out for the current players. Let's hope this staff stays longer than a year. Most of all, let's hope that Steve Pederson doesn't get "punked" again.Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-37936816423250528472012-02-15T11:14:00.003-05:002012-02-15T11:20:18.166-05:00Pitt Basketball: Identity CrisisAfter the final buzzer sounded on Sunday, Pitt Basketball finds itself at 15-11 with a 4-9 record in Big East conference play. For this team or any Pitt team in the Jamie Dixon era, this has been a situation they've never had to deal with. For Pitt fans: they're baffled, frustrated, and some are just pissed. For Jamie Dixon haters, this has been the season they've been dreaming of.<br /><br />I could sit here and try to analyze what has happened with this team, but I'll be repeating every entry from every Pitt blog known to man. As the season ends, we're still asking ourselves these same questions: Who is this team? What is their identity? <br /><br />That's the part that has most Pitt fans frustrated. We don't know. The team itself probably doesn't know. Jamie Dixon is also still trying to figure this out. <br /><br />As much as Pitt has missed Tray Woodall, he can't fix everything even if he's healthy. Anyone remember when Pitt lost Mike Cook for the season and Levance Fields for a period of time? Luckily they had Blair, Sam Young, and Ron Ramon to weather the storm. This team doesn't have those guys. They have talent, but not leadership to step up when it hits the fan. Need Proof? Watch them play. <br /><br />You could say the tone for this season was set last year when Nasir Robinson committed one of the most dumbest fouls in the history of Pitt Basketball. That's been the problem with this team. They're bright...they're talented...they just don't play up to it at times. Would the NIT would be a good thing for this team? It could make Jamie Dixon take a long hard look at his team. Maybe instead putting a band-aid on certain situations like putting Gibbs at PG, he tries to fix these situations more permanently. Other than Woodall, Pitt hasn't had a true PG since Fields graduated. It would also help him determine the players that need to held accountable, but it doesn't seem that's being done this season. <br /><br />Or maybe we're all just over-reacting to this? Maybe it's one of those things where you're gonna have a season where things are a mess. I remember sitting at Three Rivers in 1998 when Steeler fans tossed their beers onto the field after losing to the Cincinnati Bengals to finish 7-9. We were used to winning and making the playoffs. It didn't matter who the Steelers lost in the offseason, they always had someone to come in take their place. That's until they ran out of those type of players, or they just didn't draft the right players. <br /><br />Two things this team can do: Finish Strong or just say "F*** it, we're done. Wanna go to Five Guys?". Then again, it takes "Five Guys" to bring a good burger. <br /><br />Does Pitt have "Five Guys"?Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-81608674358662672282011-10-01T20:04:00.009-04:002011-10-02T10:33:59.959-04:00Open Letter from Pitt to ACC<span class="Apple-style-span"><i><b>Blawnox</b></i> - Dear ACC Members,</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">We want to thank you for accepting us into your conference. We're going to be honest up front and throughout. But let's just say, you saved us. You saved us from hell. We know it, we thank you, we always wanted to be here, it's the best fit for us, we could not be happier.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br />It's not to say we don't add value. We hope you think we do. But to be clear, we want to thank you. Pitt is not WVU, or Louisville, or UConn, or some others you may have danced with. We're a little different - we put academia and teaching first. That hurts us on the field at times. We know it. We're not Ohio State, or USC. We really don't want to be them, honestly. Obviously, in a way we REALLY do. But not in our heart of hearts. We'd rather lose in a fun game, and get along with our competitors if the alternative is to lie, cheat and steal in a win anyway possible, NCAA-2011 type of way. We know you understand these thoughts.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">However, we're a little bit "in your face type of folks". Not like SEC people or anything. We just want you to know where our heads are coming in to this thing. A little feedback, if you will. So let's go down the list, in no particular order.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">1. <b><i>University of Maryland</i></b>: Let's start easy. We know you, even though, for some reason, we never play in any sports. You and I are pretty much the same in all ways, except for your weird obsession with Lacrosse. Very good school, very good research, very good basketball. The only thing we don't understand is why the entire state could care less about college football. I mean, no one, anywhere. That's ok. Frankly, we like you. We always have. If this was a guy-girl situation, we'd marry you and be happy forever.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">2. <i><b>University of Virginia</b></i>: You seem like the son of the rich lawyer up the street who will never BE a rich lawyer. That's ok, since you don't really act as if you're better than others. You just seem to be into your own thing. That's cool. Not really known for football or basketball. Or really anything except for Thomas Jefferson. Just into being a good school who wears goofy outfits to football games. There's nothing wrong with that. Seriously, no one could hate you as you're a good guy. But no one really loves you either. Think about that.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">3. <b><i>Virginia Tech</i></b>: You're like the ugly girl in middle school who lost some weight and got a nose job, now acts as if she's been the perennial Homecoming queen. You just don't have any sense about you. And we beat you...in your best years...badly. Get it together. We're being friends here. Everyone is starting to hate you, when we all used to like you a lot.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">4. <i><b>Duke</b></i>: We've never met a Duke alum we didn't like. We never met a Duke fan, non-alum, we did like. Who knows how this happens. Do we blame you? Sort of. Being perfectly open and honest, you are a little uppity and douchey. You aren't over the top though, and we respect that. But just be on-notice that you're pushing it. Big time. Don't get one more step douchey or we have to take action.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">5. <i><b>Boston College</b></i>: Fuck you. Seriously, fuck you. You're assholes. Always have been, always will be. Why are you in a conference that pushes basketball, lacrosse, and baseball, when all you give two craps about is the Bean Pot Trophy? Seriously, people in Boston don't even like you. They'd root for Northeastern to beat you in football if you were 11-0 and headed to a sure-win BCS Championship game. Literally, no one likes you. Never. We ALL believe you are pedophiles who eat feces.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">6. <i><b>University of North Carolina</b></i>: Please, let me thank you for all you've done. We know it was you who reached out and got this all done. We don't bite the hand that feeds. We've always respected you. Heck, UNC is the secondary college basketball team in Pennsylvania. We like your style, even though you live in a town with a foofy name. No matter - we know you mean well. You're willing to fire a very successful football coach because he compromised your integrity; that fits us just right. Keep on doing what you do, UNC. We've always liked you, big time.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">7. <i><b>North Carolina State University</b></i>: We hate to admit it, but you remind us of us. Only worse. You pretty much screw up anything you can touch, just like us. You screw up Olympic sports, you screw up basketball, you screw up football. Beyond us, you screw up research and academics, when you live in the ####ing RESEARCH TRIANGLE!!!! We'd ask, "WTF?," but then again, we'd have to answer the same question. So we're happy to just wink at you and say hello in the hallway but just keep walking. Let's just pretend we don't know each other so as others won't notice how dysfunctional we are.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">8. <i><b>Wake Forest</b></i>: We don't know you. No one does. No one cares either. I hate to be cruel, but the world just doesn't give two shits about Wake Forest. It's one of the "extremely expensive for no good reason" private Universities. If you're going to pay that much, go to Harvard or Yale. Oh, that's right, you couldn't get in there. You were just sort of dumb but dad was rich, so you went to some dumbass school in tobacco land and acted as if your shit doesn't stink. Well, it does. And you're dumb. And your school sucks. And your team sucks. I know this sounds really mean and rude. But I have to be honest - you're annoying. Decent people = yes. But who pays $50K+ per year to go to Wake Forest? Come on.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">9. <b><i>Georgia Tech</i></b>: You're alright with us. Pitt has no beef with the good people of Atlanta. Now Univ of Georgia? yeah, they suck. We know you know that. We know you know how it feels to be the city school with the smarter and more socially adept kids who lose out in popularity to the big state school out in the country full of bumpkins and retards. We get it. We know your pain. You are the southern version of us, except we have uglier chics. Not by far though. Georgia Tech: you are our blood brothers. Call if you need us, and you know we're there.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">10. <i><b>Florida State University</b></i>: Pitt has some affection for you. Always has. However, if we're being honest, you need to get over yourselves. The fact is, you had an incredible run under Bowden. Incredible! His run of success and consistency may never be matched. But we, and the nation, are sick of hearing how Jimbo is great, and you're right back on track. You're not. And face facts: you may never be again. Trust us - this stuff has a way of fizzling. Don't want to believe it? Go look at our history when it seemed impossible for us to screw up. But you think you're smarter than us, right? Ok. Just tell us when you win the conference again. We know you believe it's yours to lose every year. What we're saying is, it's not going to happen. Hear us now, believe us later. Oh, and your school sucks academically. Get that shit together because UCF and USF are lapping you. It's embarrassing.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">11. <i><b>Clemson University</b></i>: You're the rednecks of the ACC. It sounds as if that's bad and I'm going down a negative line but let me stop you right there. We're from Pennsylvania - we ALL have family and friends like you. And truth be told, we love those guys. I mean, LOVE those guys. They chew snuff at work, they drive forklifts, they own junkyards. Whatever - it's all good. We'll never admit it to high society but we love watching games with those guys. We make it a point to find them at the family Christmas party because we know who brought the booze. You're all good with us. All cards on the table: you may be the one school in the country we never had a beef with. AND you have really hot chics, who are slutty. You guys are awesome.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">12. <i><b>University of Miami</b></i>: You guys are straight trash. We know you don't care. You're at some douchey club with guys who wear sunglasses inside, popping their collars, dancing to the spins of DJ Whatever. You're the worst kind of trash. Don't ask me to define it because I don't owe you shit. But be aware - your good football days are over forever. Accept it - it's never coming back. You never had a basketball team. And only poor Hispanics care about baseball so good luck with that. Shalala is a fucking criminal. Kiss my ass, you fucking bitches.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">13. <i><b>Syracuse University</b></i>: I'm using this opportunity to give you a piece of my mind. Actually, this is positive feedback. We've known each other a long time. You and I both know that we thought we were going to be stuck with WVU in some trailer park forever. Thank god, bro. Thank god we got through this. You've always been a good buddy. Remember that time we got drunk before the middle school dance and Mrs. Kramer asked why we were dancing so wildly? And then we pissed on Todd Cohen's leg? Good times. We're glad you're in this with us. And we're glad you decided to completely give up on football, even worse than we did.</span></div>Wlat 3:16http://www.blogger.com/profile/12628862261761216257noreply@blogger.com169tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-32798414061409758332011-09-05T14:26:00.000-04:002011-09-05T14:26:05.209-04:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<i>Waco - </i>This off-season, the Big East welcomed it's newest member, TCU. Conference leaders expanded into Texas, mostly in order to bring a legitimate football team into the fold. You know, one that could actually finish ranked.<br />
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TCU, looking for a home to get an automatic berth to BCS games, was eager to join the Big East; namely because the Big 10/12 and SEC didn't want them. It seemed a match made in heaven.<br />
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It should be noted that TCU will officially begin conference play in 2012. However, the result was what would be expected: TCU, after not losing any regular season games in the past two seasons, immediately goes out and gets ass-pounded by a crappy Baylor team. More disturbing, after finishing the past two seasons with the overall #1 ranked defense in the NCAA, gave up 50 points and 564 yards to Baylor. That's right, the same Baylor team who hasn't won a bowl game since 1994. In fact, has been in exactly one bowl game since 1994.<br />
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Is this a coincidence? Or is this the curse of the Big East? You decide.<br />
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<br />Wlat 3:16http://www.blogger.com/profile/12628862261761216257noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-55715015517682550092011-08-28T02:10:00.003-04:002011-08-28T02:30:24.118-04:00Drunken Big East Preview - Top Four.<span style="font-weight: bold;">1. Cincinnati </span>
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<br />Look...we know....last year was bad for this squad. Zach <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Collaros</span> pissed off a lot of fantasy owners. This year may be different. On Offense, the return <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Collaros</span>, DJ Woods, and Isaiah <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Pead</span>. Defense, they return a lot in terms of veteran leadership.
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<br />Plus it was either this or pick <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">WVU</span> to win the conference.
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<br />2. Pitt
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<br />Pitt's really not in bad of shape as a lot of people thought. Offense, they're pretty solid at QB, RB, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">WR</span>. Offensive line may have some question marks, but that's been the same tired story at Pitt.
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<br />On defense, the main concern should be the secondary as they are known to fuck things up.
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<br />Plus, with Graham banning twitter, he may add some masculinity to some of his players including Cam Saddler who was tweeting so much...you'd think he was a woman. Then again, he played <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">likc</span> a bitch.
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<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">3. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">USF</span> </span>
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<br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">USF</span> is a always the trendy pick to win the Big East since they joined the conference. This year is no different. They return a good core on defense. On offense, they'll win or lose with <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">BJ</span> Daniels. When he's on, he'd dangerous. When he's off, he looks a QB from any team on Madden that's being controlled from a first time user.
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<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">4. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">WVU</span></span>
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<br />When your state produces more incidents of incest and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">bestiality</span> than it does Division 1 prospects, then you got issues. Other than Geno Smith, there's not much to write about on offense. Defense? Fuck 'em. Maybe Oliver Luck will get them in the Arena League.
<br />Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-26141331230823387102011-08-28T01:54:00.002-04:002011-08-28T02:09:33.970-04:00Drunken Big East Preview - Bottom Four5. Syracuse
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<br />Syracuse comes off a win over Kansas State in the Pinstripe Bowl. On offense, they return their Starting QB Ryan Nassib and most of their offensive line. Other than that, there's not much to talk about. They have a midget for a running back and their star WR is in some legal trouble.
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<br />On defense, they have to replace two starters on their D-line and two starters at linebacker. Their secondary should be fine. They'll go to a bowl game and brag about it.
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<br />6. Louisville
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<br />They'll be on probation in a year....NEXT.
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<br />7. UConn
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<br />UConn returns most of its starters from it's Offensive Line and Defensive line. Other than that, not much else.
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<br />8. Rutgers
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<br />Rutgers returns most of its sorry team from last season. On Offense, they'll rely on Chas Dodd whose is about as accurate as Michael J. Fox throwing darts. The offensive line won't help much either...they suck. On defense, they return most of its starters that got their asses handed to them.
<br />Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-56801356503082854722011-06-24T01:14:00.003-04:002011-06-24T01:54:34.517-04:00PITT-PSU and Expansion<span style="font-weight: bold;">PITT-PSU Series</span><br /><br />Pitt and PSU decided renew the "rivalry" for at least two games. Some Pitt fans are applauding this. Some are not. Reasons include the series not being long term and whatever hard-on they have for Steve Pederson. Two things stood out to me with this announcement<br /><br />1. JoePA isn't as "mighty" as everyone has made him out to be. <br />2. Tim Curley is taking "full control" of PSU's Athletic Department. By "full", he's taking over football too. <br /><br />Curley has made some nice hires around the board as of late. He also had the balls to boot Rene Portland. I also imagine he told Ed Dechellis to move on with life's work if he couldn't get the basketball team in the Big Dance again. <br /><br />There's a reason to be optimistic about this two game series...it could lead to more. Unless PSU fans are still pussy enough to complain whatever verbal abuse they received from Pitt fans. <br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Expansion</span><br /><br />This is obviously one of the hot topics of the Big East as of late. Long story short: Villanova is interested, made a presentation, and they were sent packing...which made Pitt/Rutgers look like the bad guys in this. They weren't the bad guys. Villanova for the most part didn't have their shit together. Because if you let 'Nova in with a half-assed plan, then you might as well let Georgetown join as well because they can play their games at RFK.<br /><br />Ever since then, there's been a mass hysteria of a "split". It's not going to happen. That television deal that's in the works? It's all about basketball. Basketball is the Cash Cow of the Big East. Football can't stand on its own two feet let alone in a BCS bowl game these days. Sure you can trim the "fat" off the basketball-only schools, but that's another battle. Lot of politics and a lot of relationships there. <br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"></span>Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-40883943672675909722011-06-24T00:49:00.002-04:002011-06-24T01:13:15.591-04:00Big East Preview Part 1: Offseason AssclowneryThe Big East was a total comedy once season play ended and it carried on when bowl season was over. Let's do a quick recap of what happened: <br /><br />1. Pitt forces out Dave Wannstedt.<br />2. WVU hires Dana Holgerson to replace Bill Stewart after next season.<br />3. Pitt hires Mike Haywood. <br />4. Pitt fires Mike Haywood after he pulls an Ike Turner on his babymama. <br />5. After watching his team get pounded by Oklahoma, Randy Edsall takes a separate plane to College Park to take the Maryland job.<br />6. UConn drags Paul Pasqualoni out of a bar and names him head coach. <br />7. Pitt hires Todd Graham to replace Haywood. <br />8. Dana Holgerson gets booted out of a casino and WVU punishes him by firing Bill Stewart. <br /><br />There you have it. Somewhere in this, Rutgers, Syracuse, USF, Cincy, and Louisville stayed out of the drama. <br /><br />Later in the month, we'll be previewing the Big East. Until then, here's a really half-assed analysis of the conference.<br /><br />The Favorite: WVU. People just love their new head coach. I don't know why, but they do. Maybe it's all those offenses he ran in the Midwest that are a dime a dozen. <br /><br />The Fucked: UConn. They were due to be a bottom feeder one day. <br /><br />Can Go Fuck Themselves: Rutgers. They're Rutgers.Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-30248049540229622192011-04-18T00:11:00.006-04:002011-04-18T00:55:26.744-04:00Panther Rants 2011 Blue-Gold Game DiaryAnother exciting year of Spring Drills were upon us. Out goes the Power Football......In comes High Octane. While I don't have the liberty of 'tweeting' or 'live blogging', I kept a running diary with my thoughts and analysis. Here goes.......<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1:00pm</span> - Getting ready for the spring game. Yes it's 1pm. It's 1pm Central time. That's what's great about living here. Everything starts an hour early.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1:05pm</span> - Outside enjoying the nice weather with my son. We're bike riding. It's 85 degrees here....you really think I would be inside watching a glorified practice?<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1:30pm</span>- Nicki Minaj is playing in Houston tonight and I can tell. Almost every girl I see....even a grown ass woman....has their hair like Nicki Minaj in some way. Houston's local hip hop station had a Nicki Minaj lookalike contest. The majority of the contestants I swear I've seen at Walmart. <br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1:40pm</span> - A woman with a hot pink wig on....eating pork skins...and drinking a red soda walks by. We exchange hellos and tells me how cute my son is. She's heading to see Nicki tonight. If this was the Burgh, she'd probably ask me what the fuck am I looking at.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2:10pm</span> - We decided to go in and cool off. I get to watch the same episode of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse for the 1000th time. <br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2:30pm</span> - I got the characters figured out:<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Mickey Mouse</span> - He represents domestic abuse. He beats the shit out of Minnie and they both act as if everything is okay so no one questions it. Eventually one of them is going to be found on a hillside.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Minnie Mouse</span> - Represents 'Pharming' and 'Free Basing'. To deal with Mickey, she needs an outlet. Which is why she probably has a big cabinet full of prescription drugs.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Donald Duck</span> - Represents Alcoholism. He's dressed as a sailor for fuck's sake. He's the old married dude who hangs at the bar and tries to cock-block every guy from getting the hot chick that even he can't bang.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Daisy Duck</span> - Represents Infidelity. While Donald's out getting juiced, she's out getting banged. She's probably a swinger too.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Goofy</span> - Represents Rehab and Relapse. Don't invite him over to hang out, some of your belongings may come up missing. <br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">Pluto</span> - Represnts Dog-fighting. Don't fuck with him. Don't let your kid pet him. He's not friendly.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">3:00pm</span> - Son's asleep and I'm checking the boards. They're saying over 1,000 in attendance. Guess that will be blamed on Steve. Tino's having a good day passing so every Pitt poster with WPIAL ties are jerking themselves off.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">3:10pm</span> - Everyone is happy with the offense performing well on a rainy day, but the defense is getting ripped.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">3:30pm</span> - If Pitt gave me press credentials, I'd either show up drunk or sell them to a homeless guy for his bottle of Gin.Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-63099696716201787092011-04-18T00:00:00.002-04:002011-04-18T00:07:28.196-04:00JJ Richardson 2010-2011 John DeGroat Award WinnerPanther Rants is happy to announce the 2010-2011 John Degroat Award. This year, the award goes to seldomly-used JJ Richardson. JJ is transferring out of Pitt. Not to pick on him, but we wish him well. He didn't do bad when he was called to go in. Maybe if Dante Taylor doesn't have the McDonalds AA tag slapped on him, JJ stays and Dante's the one being sent to Towson with his paperwork. <br /><br />You know Dante has shown some flashes he's Mickie D's AA that Pitt recruited. Other times, he looks like he's eaten at Mickie D's. If he doesn't get his act together, he'll receive the 'Gilbert Brown' Award. The award will go the player who takes 4 years to get his shit together.Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-21619717603594589842011-04-15T00:55:00.006-04:002011-04-15T01:10:12.882-04:00Who will winThe John Degroat Award?The John Degroat Award was originally awarded to the seldom-used JUCO player on the basketball team. Every other year, Jamie would recruit a JUCO player....and well..he would never play them. Here's a look at our previous winners:<br /><br />2006-2007 - Doyle Hudson<br /><br />Doyle was recruited by Jamie because he saw him play against Levon Kendall in some league in the offseason and Jamie liked how Doyle played against him. You know Levon was that guy who scored 50 points in some Canadian national game. Doyle didn't see much playing time in his two years.<br /><br />2007-2008 - Cassin Diggs<br /><br />Cassin was cut when the season ended to make room for Jermaine Dixon. That's really about it.<br /><br />2008-2009 - Austin Wallace<br /><br />Here's where the Degroat Award changes. We didn't have any Juco's that flamed out that year...so we had to give it to someone.<br /><br />2009-2010 - Dwight Miller<br /><br />Dwight just never panned out. People liked him when he would play at Greentree, but Greentree is nothing but a glorified AND-1 tournament.<br /><br />Candidates for 2010-2011 are: JJ Richardson, Isaiah Epps, Lamar Patterson, Dante Taylor, Cameron Wright, and Talib Zanna.<br /><br />So who will win?Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6126328281296563379.post-2912451469246200892011-04-15T00:37:00.002-04:002011-04-15T00:54:19.865-04:00The Mike Gansey AwardEvery year at Pantherrants, we have the prestigious "Mike Gansey Award". Okay, we don't give it out every year. For some reason every time Pitt has gone against a team with white players, the white players have the games of their lives. Maybe it's because Pitt players took them too lightly. It's like watching a boxing match and being the only person to bet on the white guy...and win. Let's look at the previous winners:<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2007-2008 - Drew Neitzel</span>: I think Ronald Ramon is still chasing him around the court.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2008-2009 - Alex Ruoff:</span> Killed Pitt in the Big East Tournament<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2009-2010</span> - The white players on the Notre Dame team. <br /><br />And the 2010-2011 winner......is........<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">It's a tie between The white players on the Notre Dame team and Matt Howard</span>. I honestly thought it would be Jimmy Fredette as I had nightmares of Gary McGhee guarding him. <br /><br />Notre Dame wins for obvious reasons. They exposed our weaknesses which is taking advantage of our center who tends to have the hand-eye coordination of a drunk driver at times and our passive aggressive defense on the perimeter. In football terms, it's like having Brian Bennett cover Larry Fitzgerald. <br /><br />Matt Howard wins for obvious reasons. I don't hate Matt Howard. I don't fault him for flopping. If he can't get away with it by drawing fouls, more power to him. It was fun to witness the refs put their whistles away in Houston.Wanny's Moustachehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12489393895043480144noreply@blogger.com1