Panther Rants is The Onion of Pitt Sports. Formerly a serious recruiting blog written by a serious recruiting writer, the site was taken over by mediocre bloggers that provide satire, sarcasm and anything but serious information. Everything on this site is tongue-in-cheek and is not meant for serious consumption.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Wannstedt Receives Praise

Blawnox - Pitt Head Football Coach received a strange call at approximately 6am this morning. On the other end was none other than the legendary professional bowler, "Big Ern" McCracken. "I never expected a call that early in the morning," confessed Coach Wannsedt, "but I'll take any positive news I can get."

McCracken commented. "Listen, I'm in Vegas for a big match. The girls and I are up late drinking Tanqueray and Tab, ya know. We're having a good time with some high rollers. We're laying some money on games for tomorrow when I see the highlights from yesterday. And damn if that Pitt game wasn't the Munson of the year."

Wannstedt stated, "I have no idea who or what a Munson award is, but it sure sounds good to me. I knew a guy named Munson once; he worked third shift at the mill and he was a great guy. We used to get some Irons after a shift and sometimes sneak in some cole slaw and fish sandwiches. Heckuva guy."

McCracken continued, "Wannstedt on that sideline, running his hands through his hair, screwing up in a big moment when he had the world by the tail, just made my heart warm thinking of my buddy Roy. Well, Roy can't really run his fingers through his hair because he doesn't have hair or fingers, ha! Ha-ha! Alright reporter guy, I have some needy single mothers to take care of..."


Anonymous said...


Jazzie Casas said...

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Anonymous said...

Looks like this site is rellying losing it!

Jazzie is a guy!

Well at least we had some excitment!

Bring back WLAT!

Well, maybe not but you have to admit he was more fun than Wanny!

Anonymous said...

Sorry for the poor spelling!